Inflation Hits Hooker Industry

Fake breasts aren’t the only thing being grossly inflated in the whore industry these days… the price tags for their clients have ballooned as well. Just ask former New York Governor Eliot Spitzer:

He paid $4,300 for 2.5 hours with a call girl he met at the Mayflower Hotel in Washington. Court papers state he also paid for train tickets, cab fare, mini-bar and room service charges for Kristen — a 5-foot-5, 105-pound brunette he arranged to meet the night of February 13.

What is the only industry to see greater year-to-year price increases than gasoline/oil? If you guessed hoes, you guessed right. See chart below illustrating the increase in hourly investment for a hooker, from 1993 until today:

whoremarket

What could POSSIBLY be worth $4,500 and change that made this 5 foot 5 beauty worth every buck? Nothing… Eliot Spitzer is an idiot and has further burdened Americas prostitution customers by setting a new precedent for high prices.

But in all seriousness… what on earth was he thinking? $4,500? Caught via text messages and e-mails? I’m surprised his poor wife stood next to him during the press conference. As if having it happen wasn’t embarrassing enough how about facing the entire country while your husband admits he paid thousands to sleep with someone for a couple hours.. talk about feeling useless.

So what happens to Eliot Spitzer after this? Who knows… who cares… hopefully he disappears into the silence of the night. But someone tell that pretty little 5′5″ Call Girl to show her face… we want to see how stupid Eliot really is.

I wonder if she Spitzered or Swallowed.

Election 2008 Rap Song

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LYRICS:

Are you kiddin me? Who really wants Hillary
In charge of the military’s artillery?
That crazy ladies gonna git us all killed
Hows she gonna end a war if she can’t finish Bill?
Bill will be, in the oval office, makin oral offers
Puttin Cuban Mades in a Cuban Maid
Hopin he gets laid, and when he does,
He’ll put the blame on foreign aid (Bill: “It was foreign aid”)
What do Al Gore and Fat girls have in common?
(breathing heavily) They both got tired of running.
The chance that Barrack Obama gets elected?
The same that Iraq and Osama were connected.
None, zilch, zero… but I hope he does win
Cause he’d be better than every single republican
Except for maybe Ron Paul, but he can’t win it yet,
Cause you can’t vote on the internet,
You know how much trouble our country is in?
We could have a pretty boy runnin the government.
Picture John Edwards, dropping a bomb,
Make the call from a spa & salon with a thong on.
Sendem to war while he’s getting a pedicure.
Blow the whole budget at the Jcrew Store?

[EDWARDS] Uh hi, yes, I’d like one small frappucino?

CHORUS:
All these candidates in my face
In the presidential race
All these candidates…
I can’t standem
(Repeat 1x)

It’s not Rudy’s faulT he benefited from 9/11
But it IS his fault he married his cousin.
They got divorced but I bet he still loves her,
President? More like the West Virginia Governor!
I can picture Mitt Romney, Under a palm tree,
Calling home and crying to mommy:
[SOBBING] “Mom I just wasted 50 million dollars”
Spent $50 million (BALLLLIN)
Now he’s just (BAWWWLIN)
Coulda spent that money and fixed up New Orleans
How I see them is, How I call them,
Dennis Kucinich looks like one of bart’s friends.
I’ll vote for him if he yells one thing out loud:
“Everything’s coming up millhouse”
Losing will be hard to swallow, for Mike Huckabee
Luckily, he no longer needs so much to eat!
One guy who wants Mike to get the nod,
Is Jared – he doesn’t want to lose his job.
Fred Thompsons really aged ya know
Since he played Dr. Crane on that Frasier Show…
[Critic] That was Kelsey Grammar – that wasn’t him
There goes any chance that he’s gonna win
John McCain must be a Beach Boys fan
He wants to Bomb-Bomb-Bomb, Bomb-Bomb Iran.

CHORUS 2x

[Talks remainder of time]

There are some other guys that are irrelevant…
Tom Tornado or something
Duncan Hunter -
You know why nobody supports Duncan Hunter?
Because Ann Coulter DOES.

Hey…. Yall want to talk politics…
Hit me up… PoliticalFury.com baby… GIA

[Chorus 2X to fade out…]